silicon.valley.s01e07

5
00:00:00,000 –> 00:00:06,020
{\an5}{\pos(240,242)}本字幕由人人影视字幕组翻译
禁止用作任何商业盈利行为

6
00:00:06,020 –> 00:00:08,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
王二川

7
00:00:08,020 –> 00:00:11,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
七七

8
00:00:08,430 –> 00:00:10,330
核心压缩算法调试完毕
The core compression algorithm is optimal.

9
00:00:10,330 –> 00:00:11,950
测试案例调试完毕
All the test cases ran optimal.

10
00:00:11,020 –> 00:00:14,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
CiciXT唧唧咕咕

11
00:00:11,950 –> 00:00:13,610
压缩评分分数理想
The Weissman score is optimal.

12
00:00:13,740 –> 00:00:15,980
‘纽核力’也很理想
Looks like Nucleus is optimal.

13
00:00:14,020 –> 00:00:17,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
蓝光章鱼X

14
00:00:16,170 –> 00:00:18,250
不错 不错
Good. Good.

15
00:00:17,020 –> 00:00:20,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
吃货丁小七

16
00:00:18,590 –> 00:00:19,840
恭喜 各位
Congratulations, guys.

17
00:00:20,020 –> 00:00:23,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
抹茶咖啡

18
00:00:23,020 –> 00:00:26,020
{\pos(330,220)}翻译
王大可

19
00:00:23,610 –> 00:00:24,940
-太棒了 -好哥们

  • Oh, yeah. - Oh, dog.

20
00:00:27,450 –> 00:00:31,230
{\an8}发布倒计时 第0天

21
00:00:31,360 –> 00:00:34,350
{\an8}开销预算

22
00:00:33,640 –> 00:00:37,300
理查德 文件”消化”引擎已经可以测试了
Richard, the ingestion engine is ready for testing.

23
00:00:37,300 –> 00:00:38,940
你看到理查德了吗
Have you seen Richard?

24
00:00:38,940 –> 00:00:40,070
他在里面 他的消化引擎
He’s in there, having a little trouble

25
00:00:40,070 –> 00:00:41,830
出了点小问题
with his personal ingestion engine.

26
00:00:41,830 –> 00:00:45,120
还没完 都一个小时了 引擎必须得测
Still? It’s been an hour. He’s gotta get this done.

27
00:00:43,560 –> 00:00:46,560
{\pos(330,220)}时间轴
安安

28
00:00:45,120 –> 00:00:48,290
他带着膝上笔电进去的 就放膝盖上
Oh, he’s got his laptop in there, on top of his lap.

29
00:00:46,570 –> 00:00:49,570
{\pos(330,220)}时间轴
sOF

30
00:00:49,330 –> 00:00:50,570
理查德
Hey, Richard.

31
00:00:50,910 –> 00:00:52,890
我在厕所里 别和我说话
Don’t talk to me while I’m in the bathroom please.

32
00:00:52,900 –> 00:00:54,480
赶紧完事 我们得出发了
Well, snap it off, we gotta go.

33
00:00:54,490 –> 00:00:56,970
我知道 我在厕所里时别和我说话
I know. Just don’t talk to me while I’m in here.

34
00:00:56,970 –> 00:00:57,660
感觉很奇怪
It’s weird.

35
00:00:57,760 –> 00:01:00,180
天 贾里德从岛上回来
Oh, my God. Jared’s been back from that island

36
00:01:00,180 –> 00:01:02,440
都一整天了 他居然没有放厕纸
for a whole day and he didn’t get any toilet paper?

37
00:01:02,440 –> 00:01:04,920
搞笑吗 贾里德在外面吗
Are you serious? Is Jared out there?

38
00:01:04,920 –> 00:01:06,530
你不是在厕所里的时候
I thought you didn’t want me to talk to you

39
00:01:06,530 –> 00:01:08,700
不希望我和你说话 你到底要怎样
while you were in the bathroom. Make up your mind.

40
00:01:08,700 –> 00:01:10,860
拜托 你走开就好了
You know what? Just get away from the door, please.

41
00:01:10,860 –> 00:01:12,740
周五的时候 泳池清洁工会来
Friday, the pool cleaner comes.

42
00:01:12,740 –> 00:01:14,330
-你听懂我的话了吗 -是的

  • Do you understand? - Yes.

43
00:01:14,330 –> 00:01:15,580
明天是垃圾回收日
And tomorrow is trash day

44
00:01:15,590 –> 00:01:17,620
瓶瓶罐罐都要放在前门
so make sure all the cans are out front.

45
00:01:17,620 –> 00:01:18,440
是的
Yes.

46
00:01:17,720 –> 00:01:20,720
{\pos(330,220)}校对
桑极客德

47
00:01:18,440 –> 00:01:23,100
无论如何 不要买电影回来看
Now, you are under no circumstances to order any movie on demand,

48
00:01:23,100 –> 00:01:24,540
黄不黄都不行
adult or otherwise.

49
00:01:24,540 –> 00:01:25,450
是的
Yes.

50
00:01:25,450 –> 00:01:28,330
好了 我刚说的你有哪里不明白吗
OK, has anything that I’ve just said confused you?

51
00:01:28,330 –> 00:01:30,860
-好的 -你妈蛋

  • Yes. - Goddamn it!

52
00:01:31,270 –> 00:01:33,950
我的天 你是打包了整个衣柜吗
Jesus, Cher. Are you bringing your whole closet?

53
00:01:33,950 –> 00:01:37,420
我可是专业人士 迪尼希 不允许有差错
I’m a pro, Dinesh. I won’t apologize for it.

54
00:01:37,420 –> 00:01:40,160
我会根据场所气氛的不同改变着装
I dress according to the moods that I sense in the room.

55
00:01:40,160 –> 00:01:42,800
因此 我得做好万全的准备
As such, I must have options.

56
00:01:42,800 –> 00:01:44,680
东西都打包好了吧 准备出发了
We all packed and ready to go?

57
00:01:45,000 –> 00:01:47,870
可以开我的车去 但油钱由公司出
We can take my car but gas is on the company.

58
00:01:49,300 –> 00:01:52,050
有人吗 大家都走了吗
Hello? Did everyone leave?

59
00:01:52,400 –> 00:01:53,580

No.

60
00:01:53,600 –> 00:01:54,550
什么
What?

65
00:01:55,090 –> 00:01:58,640
{\pos(52,64)}原创翻译 双语字幕

66
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an6}第

67
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an6}一

68
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an6}季

69
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an6}第

70
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an6}七

71
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an6}集

72
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an4}{\pos(234.6,240)}硅

73
00:02:02,140 –> 00:02:05,100
{\an4}{\pos(275.4,224.8)}谷

74
00:02:05,100 –> 00:02:08,100
{\pos(50,220)}视效&后期
冰冰爱旭旭

75
00:02:06,830 –> 00:02:08,570
我不能理解 你怎么做到在车里看屏幕
I don’t know how you read your screen in the car.

76
00:02:08,100 –> 00:02:11,100
{\pos(50,220)}总监
面条打包子

77
00:02:08,570 –> 00:02:10,050
换做是我 能把胃都吐出来
It makes me sick as a dog.

78
00:02:10,050 –> 00:02:11,800
只要我不去想 就没事
I’m OK as long as I don’t think about it.

79
00:02:11,810 –> 00:02:13,580
何况 明天才演示
Besides, the presentation is tomorrow.

80
00:02:13,580 –> 00:02:16,450
这么说 只要你不去想
So if you just don’t think about it it really doesn’t bother you

81
00:02:16,450 –> 00:02:18,590
车子跑在路上 还会转弯 大家都反胃
to be staring at the screen when the car’s moving

82
00:02:18,590 –> 00:02:21,040
-你就能无压力地看屏幕… -天呐

  • and turning and you’re all queasy… - Oh, God!

83
00:02:21,830 –> 00:02:22,560
吉尔弗约尔
Gilfoyle.

84
00:02:22,560 –> 00:02:26,530
看 我就知道不可能没事 骗子
See, I knew it bothered you. Fucking liar.

85
00:02:33,140 –> 00:02:34,950
{\an8}展会中心

86
00:02:37,660 –> 00:02:40,090
虽然我滞留在岛上四天 信息有点落后
So I’m a little behind, being stuck on that island for four days,

87
00:02:40,100 –> 00:02:41,930
但我觉得我都考虑到了
but I think I’m on top of everything.

88
00:02:42,350 –> 00:02:45,110
好了 把身份证给我 我去登记
OK, give me your IDs and I’ll go register us…

89
00:02:45,110 –> 00:02:47,820
你们来了 拿好你们的身份牌和手带
There you are. Got your credentials and wristbands

90
00:02:47,820 –> 00:02:50,110
预演是今天下午四点
for the walkthrough at 4:00 today.

91
00:02:50,110 –> 00:02:51,440
预演
Uh, walkthrough?

92
00:02:51,440 –> 00:02:53,640
对 基本上 就是为比赛做下校音
Yeah, basically, it’s a sound check for the competition.

93
00:02:53,640 –> 00:02:55,840
好吧 我们不知道有这回事
Uh, yeah, we didn’t know about that.

94
00:02:56,110 –> 00:02:58,060
我没告诉你们有预演吗
Did I not tell you about the walkthrough?

95
00:02:58,470 –> 00:03:00,460
真是抱歉
I am so sorry.

96
00:03:00,460 –> 00:03:02,300
所以才需要我来 彼得和洛恩·迈克尔斯[编剧]That’s why I’m here. Peter’s on safari

97
00:03:02,300 –> 00:03:04,690
以及侃爷·维斯特去旅游探险了 下周才回
with Lorne Michaels and Kanye West until next week

98
00:03:04,690 –> 00:03:06,650
所以这次我能全心全意地为你们服务
so I can put all of my attention on you guys for once.

99
00:03:06,650 –> 00:03:08,340
万分抱歉
I am so sorry.

100
00:03:08,340 –> 00:03:11,150
我以为我和你们说过了有预…
I thought that I talked to you guys about the walk…

101
00:03:17,690 –> 00:03:19,210
{\an8}创业公司交流展

102
00:03:21,070 –> 00:03:23,480
先生们 欢迎来到大舞台
Gentlemen, welcome to the big show.

103
00:03:23,890 –> 00:03:26,490
‘科技博客’创业展真他妈人多
TechCrunch motherfucking Disrupt.

104
00:03:26,850 –> 00:03:30,220
好了 各位 这里诱惑太多了
OK, guys, this place is a vortex of distraction.

105
00:03:30,220 –> 00:03:32,540
通常 技术圈里只有2%是女性
Normally in the tech world it’s two percent women.

106
00:03:32,600 –> 00:03:36,400
各位 在接下来的三天 会飙升至15%
Guys, these next three days, 15 percent.

107
00:03:36,450 –> 00:03:38,140
简直是酒池肉林
It’s a goddamn meat market.

108
00:03:38,140 –> 00:03:39,740
我要你们集中注意力
I need you to focus.

109
00:03:39,740 –> 00:03:43,040
我们的表现关系到公司将来的命运
How we do here is the entire future of your company.

110
00:03:43,040 –> 00:03:44,660
别搞砸了
Don’t screw it all up now.

111
00:03:44,690 –> 00:03:47,130
明天的预赛 必须让他们对我们印象深刻
We have to knock them dead in the preliminaries tomorrow

112
00:03:47,130 –> 00:03:49,410
才能晋级到周五的决赛
so we can move on to the finals on Friday.

113
00:03:49,410 –> 00:03:50,240
我有个问题
I have a question.

114
00:03:50,240 –> 00:03:53,880
流程表上说丹·梅尔彻是我们那轮的评审
The program says that Dan Melcher is judging our round.

115
00:03:53,880 –> 00:03:55,890
有办法把他从评审员中除名吗
Is there any way to get him removed?

116
00:03:55,890 –> 00:03:57,910
除非有利益冲突
Not unless there’s a conflict of interest.

117
00:03:57,910 –> 00:04:01,250
可能有 我和他老婆上过床
Well, there may be. I did have sexual intercourse with his wife.

118
00:04:03,130 –> 00:04:05,310
怎么了 都三年前的事了
What? It was three years ago.

119
00:04:05,310 –> 00:04:07,840
所以有个展会评委想宰了你
So one of the guys judging us wants to fucking kill you?

120
00:04:07,840 –> 00:04:09,900
也许吧 我不知道他发现了没有
Maybe. I don’t know if he found out.

121
00:04:09,900 –> 00:04:10,710
不管怎么样 理查德
Either way, Richard,

122
00:04:10,710 –> 00:04:13,480
你有可能得替我 所以做好准备
you may have to present instead of me so be prepared.

123
00:04:13,480 –> 00:04:15,500
什么 让我做展示 不
What, me? Present? No.

124
00:04:15,500 –> 00:04:18,450
也许没事的 他什么都不知道
We may be fine. We may be totally fine.

125
00:04:18,500 –> 00:04:20,780
当然还有可能死定了
We also may be totally fucked.

126
00:04:20,950 –> 00:04:22,600
不管怎样我都通知你
I’ll let you know either way.

127
00:04:22,980 –> 00:04:25,090
我要去联络感情了 离我远点
I’m gonna go network. Don’t approach me.

128
00:04:26,140 –> 00:04:27,590
我不想做展示
I don’t want to present.

129
00:04:27,590 –> 00:04:29,410
况且 演示版程序还没完工呢
Besides, I’m not even done with the demo.

130
00:04:29,410 –> 00:04:32,900
理查德 现在就去酒店把它做完
OK, Richard, you need to go to the hotel right now and finish.

131
00:04:32,930 –> 00:04:36,190
你帮我们办好酒店入住了
Oh, you already checked us into the hotel?

132
00:04:36,190 –> 00:04:38,220
好吧 我一个模块一个模块地完成
OK, I’m gonna do this module by module.

133
00:04:38,220 –> 00:04:40,250
迪尼希 视频播放部分你负责
Dinesh, you built the edge video player

134
00:04:40,250 –> 00:04:41,830
所以从你开始 好吗
so I’m gonna start with you first. OK?

135
00:04:41,830 –> 00:04:44,360
你们两个布置下展台 好吗
OK, you guys set up the booth, OK?

136
00:04:45,860 –> 00:04:47,010
我觉得是在这边
I think it’s this way.

137
00:04:47,020 –> 00:04:48,040
你觉得呢
You think?

138
00:04:52,220 –> 00:04:53,990
咱就只有几张传单吗
A few flyers, that’s all we have?

139
00:04:53,990 –> 00:04:56,340
恐怕是的
Yeah, I think it is.

140
00:04:56,500 –> 00:04:58,080
你好 请问你叫什么名字
Hello, what’s your name?

141
00:04:58,300 –> 00:05:01,080
欢迎访问microdrone.com
Visit us at microdrone.com…

142
00:05:01,080 –> 00:05:02,110
‘微蜂’
Oh, wow, Microdrone.

143
00:05:02,120 –> 00:05:04,540
种子资本刚给他们注资1700万美元
They just closed $17 million in seed funding.

144
00:05:07,810 –> 00:05:10,060
你好 打扰一下
Hi. Hello. Excuse me.

145
00:05:10,110 –> 00:05:10,960
你们是’魔笛手’吧
Pied Piper?

146
00:05:10,960 –> 00:05:13,470
你们会参加’创业竞技场’是吗
You guys are competing in the StartUp Battlefield, right?

147
00:05:13,470 –> 00:05:15,320
大家都在讨论你们
Everyone has been talking about your compression rate.

148
00:05:15,320 –> 00:05:17,860
都说压缩率碉堡了
I mean, it is supposed to be sick.

149
00:05:19,050 –> 00:05:20,980
不管怎么说 你一定很擅长Java吧
Anyway, you must be great with Java

150
00:05:20,980 –> 00:05:22,200
我碰到个故障
and I just cannot seem

151
00:05:22,200 –> 00:05:24,790
不知道怎么解决 能帮我看看吗
to figure out this stupid bug. Do you mind?

152
00:05:25,640 –> 00:05:26,750
我去去就回
I’ll be back.

153
00:05:28,490 –> 00:05:29,500
谢谢
Thank you.

154
00:05:29,550 –> 00:05:32,110
如果我们能每两个小时整合一个模块
If we integrate one module every two hours

155
00:05:32,110 –> 00:05:33,250
我们就需要保持良好状态…
we should be in great shape…

156
00:05:33,250 –> 00:05:36,010
理查德 跟我来 跟我来 跟我来
Richard, follow me. Follow me. Follow me.

157
00:05:36,290 –> 00:05:39,630
-好吧 酒店见 -酒店见

  • All right. See you at the hotel. - See you.

158
00:05:39,630 –> 00:05:41,110
要不了多久的
Very soon, I hope.

159
00:05:43,340 –> 00:05:46,100
老兄 我只是想祝你好运
Hey, man. Just wanted to say good luck.

160
00:05:46,410 –> 00:05:48,930
谢谢 但为什么这么…
OK, thanks. But what’s with all the…

161
00:05:48,930 –> 00:05:51,750
抱歉 不能让人看到我和你说话
Sorry. I just can’t be seen talking to you, you know?

162
00:05:51,750 –> 00:05:53,800
到处都是’互利’的人
Hooli people all over the place.

163
00:05:53,800 –> 00:05:55,110
我不知道 但我只是很融入
I don’t know, man, I’m just really into

164
00:05:55,120 –> 00:05:57,500
这种无所事事的生活
this whole rest and vest life, you know,

165
00:05:57,500 –> 00:05:59,460
比我想象的要融入得多
way more than I thought I would be.

166
00:05:59,630 –> 00:06:01,220
我只是不想搞砸
I just don’t want to rock the boat.

167
00:06:01,570 –> 00:06:04,610
对了 我跟你说过没 我买了艘小船
Oh, hey, did I tell you? I’m getting a boat.

168
00:06:04,740 –> 00:06:06,500
还雇了个人打理它
And a boat guy to take care of it.

169
00:06:06,500 –> 00:06:07,890
一定要雇个人来打理
You have to have a boat guy.

170
00:06:07,890 –> 00:06:10,000
没错 一定要雇个人来打理
Oh yeah, you’ve gotta have a boat guy…

171
00:06:10,000 –> 00:06:11,110
如果你有船的话
if you have a boat.

172
00:06:11,110 –> 00:06:14,030
你认识那边那个姑娘吧
Hey, um, you know that girl, right?

173
00:06:14,130 –> 00:06:15,790
好像叫雪莉 如果我没记错的话
Sherry, I think her name was.

174
00:06:15,790 –> 00:06:17,750
她说你们两个是同学
She said you guys went to school together.

175
00:06:17,750 –> 00:06:18,980
对 没错
Uh, OK, yeah.

176
00:06:18,980 –> 00:06:21,450
我昨晚在’闲话硅谷’的派对上见到她了
I saw her at the Valleywag party last night,

177
00:06:21,450 –> 00:06:22,620
顺便说一句 那派对太棒了
which was crazy, by the way,

178
00:06:22,620 –> 00:06:25,320
至少有12个姑娘
dude, there must’ve been like 12 girls there.

179
00:06:25,320 –> 00:06:26,720
-天呐 -棒极了

  • Holy shit. - Nuts.

180
00:06:26,720 –> 00:06:29,940
她说你们约会过几次
Anyway, she said you guys went out a couple times

181
00:06:29,940 –> 00:06:34,010
然后她把你甩了 你却不肯放手
and then she dumped you and you became obsessed with her.

182
00:06:34,010 –> 00:06:37,380
什么 她说我不肯放手
What? What? She said I was obsessed?

183
00:06:37,380 –> 00:06:38,790
反正她说不肯放手
She said obsessed.

184
00:06:38,790 –> 00:06:42,010
扯淡 我记得我们就约过两次
Uh, that’s bullshit, ‘cause I think we went out two times.

185
00:06:42,010 –> 00:06:45,120
什么事都没发生 我怎么可能被她迷住
Uh, it was nothing so how could I be obsessed? That’s…

186
00:06:45,120 –> 00:06:46,300
不 你才需要冷静
No, you’re going down!

187
00:06:46,300 –> 00:06:48,910
‘纽核力’会把’魔尿布’打的落花流水
Nucleus is gonna crush Wide Diaper.

188
00:06:48,910 –> 00:06:51,770
你不该拒绝我们老大盖文·贝尔森的
You never shoulda said no to my man, Gavin Belson.

189
00:06:54,410 –> 00:06:55,490
好吧
Ok.

190
00:06:57,810 –> 00:06:58,820
{\an8}科技博客创业展会
创业竞技场
5月16日-18日

191
00:07:00,500 –> 00:07:02,190
来了好多公司
Seeded quite a few new companies.

192
00:07:02,190 –> 00:07:05,070
“老心得” 算是心得[移动交友]的老女人版本
Spinder. It’s like Tinder but for spinsters.

193
00:07:05,070 –> 00:07:08,130
约炮的老女人们
Elderly women looking for sex.

194
00:07:07,810 –> 00:07:09,810
{\an8}评委

195
00:07:27,350 –> 00:07:29,410
有一个姑娘
There’s this girl who’s walking around,

196
00:07:29,410 –> 00:07:31,730
到处跟人说我不肯放手
saying that I’m obsessed with her.

197
00:07:32,270 –> 00:07:33,910
真我很恼火
Now that just really pisses me off.

198
00:07:33,910 –> 00:07:37,820
真好 咱忘了这件事好吗
That’s fascinating. Let’s just forget about it, OK?

199
00:07:41,060 –> 00:07:43,310
我想说这真的很烦 不是吗
I mean it’s… It’s just so fucked up, right?

200
00:07:43,310 –> 00:07:44,720
我几乎都不记得她是谁了
I mean, I barely remember her.

201
00:07:44,720 –> 00:07:46,860
但有人四处散布关于你的谣言
And it’s just so insulting to have someone walking around

202
00:07:46,900 –> 00:07:48,800
有种被侮辱的感觉 不是吗
spreading lies about you. Right?

203
00:07:49,130 –> 00:07:51,650
不知道她同事都有谁
I wonder who she’s working with.

204
00:07:51,650 –> 00:07:53,270
她和谁一起来的
Like I wonder who she’s here with

205
00:07:53,270 –> 00:07:54,990
要是她跟同事也这么说
because if she’s telling her coworkers,

206
00:07:54,990 –> 00:07:57,250
我又要操心那一大帮人怎么想了
then that’s a whole ‘nother group of people I gotta worry about.

207
00:07:57,250 –> 00:07:59,330
理查德 你现在什么都不用操心
Richard, you don’t have to worry about anything

208
00:07:59,340 –> 00:08:01,060
-管好’魔笛手’就行了 -我知道

  • except for Pied Piper right now. - Yeah, I know.

209
00:08:01,060 –> 00:08:03,590
离预赛不到24小时了
Because we have less than 24 hours ‘til the preliminaries.

210
00:08:03,850 –> 00:08:05,970
-好好好 我不操心 -这就对了

  • No one’s worrying, that’s the thing. - Perfect.

211
00:08:05,970 –> 00:08:07,020
太好了
Perfect.

212
00:08:11,030 –> 00:08:12,470
就是她
OK, her.

213
00:08:13,440 –> 00:08:15,000
她说我”不肯放手” 迪尼希
She used the word “obsessed”, Dinesh.

214
00:08:15,000 –> 00:08:17,700
-不肯放手 -理查德 我没兴趣

  • “Obsessed.” - Richard, I don’t care.

215
00:08:18,420 –> 00:08:21,700
我也没有 我就想说这个
Neither do I. That’s the entire point.

216
00:08:24,550 –> 00:08:26,740
我去扫眼她的Instagram
I’m just gonna check her Instagram real quick.

217
00:08:26,740 –> 00:08:28,730
要是她也写不肯放手
Because if she’s posting comments about me being obsessed…

218
00:08:28,740 –> 00:08:30,970
这总不能不管
I mean, I can’t just ignore that.

219
00:08:34,780 –> 00:08:36,000
有兴趣看个小装置吗
Would you be interested in a device

220
00:08:36,000 –> 00:08:37,400
与智能手机相连
that links to your smartphone

221
00:08:37,400 –> 00:08:39,200
能在发病前向你预警
and lets you know, even before it happens,

222
00:08:39,200 –> 00:08:40,430
到底是恐慌症发作
whether you’re having a panic attack

223
00:08:40,430 –> 00:08:41,830
还是心脏病发作
or a heart attack?

224
00:08:41,830 –> 00:08:43,350
‘恐慌技控’的原理是这样的
OK, here’s how Panic-A-Tech works.

225
00:08:43,360 –> 00:08:45,880
全天在指头上戴着这个就能监控重要器官
You wear this on your finger all day and it tracks your vitals.

226
00:08:45,880 –> 00:08:47,270
要是戴这个太尴尬
Or if that’s too embarrassing,

227
00:08:47,270 –> 00:08:49,190
我们还有蓝牙栓剂
there’s also a Bluetooth suppository

228
00:08:49,190 –> 00:08:51,470
就插在你想的那个地方
and that goes right where you think it goes.

229
00:08:51,470 –> 00:08:53,310
附赠回收工具包
And that comes with a retrieval kit.

230
00:08:53,310 –> 00:08:56,630
他是一副”哥俩好”的样子
Was he like, “Bro, you’re my bro,”

231
00:08:57,080 –> 00:08:59,270
还是”看爷不一枪崩了你
or was he like, “I wanna shoot you in the face

232
00:08:59,270 –> 00:09:01,220
“让你血洗会场
and watch you bleed out all over the stage

233
00:09:01,220 –> 00:09:03,900
“让你上我老婆 傻逼”这样
‘cause you fucked my wife, you cocksuck.”

234
00:09:03,900 –> 00:09:05,870
正好在中间 他是这样
Right in the middle. It was like:

235
00:09:09,510 –> 00:09:11,230
怎么了 酒店那边怎么样
What happened? How’s it going at the hotel?

236
00:09:11,230 –> 00:09:14,070
太诡异了 他做到提取元数据模块了
Weird. He switched to meta-data extraction

237
00:09:14,080 –> 00:09:15,480
还想见你
and now wants to see you.

238
00:09:15,480 –> 00:09:19,340
现在就做元数据吗 没道理啊
Meta-data? Already? Makes no sense.

239
00:09:19,340 –> 00:09:20,990
他心神不宁的
He seems very distracted.

240
00:09:23,040 –> 00:09:27,330
各位 我想稍微耍个伎俩
OK, guys, since we’re kind of playing from behind here

241
00:09:27,330 –> 00:09:29,990
就去弄了个秘密武器
I put together a little secret weapon.

242
00:09:29,990 –> 00:09:33,410
我整理了所有参展人员
I… I went through the entire list of conference participants

243
00:09:33,410 –> 00:09:36,300
把找到的头像和简介打印了
and I found images and I found bios and I printed them out

244
00:09:36,300 –> 00:09:37,580
都集中在一起方便找
so we have them all in one place.

245
00:09:37,580 –> 00:09:40,110
-你弄这个干什么 -你看

  • Why did you do that? - Uh, OK.

246
00:09:40,490 –> 00:09:43,680
这人是谁 等着 他是…
Who’s this guy? Watch. He is…

247
00:09:45,400 –> 00:09:48,740
瑞克·史密斯 ‘捷径’的联合创始人
Rick Smith, co-founder of Crosscut Ventures.

248
00:09:48,740 –> 00:09:49,790
你怎么…
How did you…?

249
00:09:49,790 –> 00:09:52,180
‘快速身份识别’ 面部识别应用程序
ID-Keen. It’s this facial recognition app

250
00:09:52,180 –> 00:09:53,480
莫妮卡给我们手机上装的
that Monica put on our phones.

251
00:09:53,480 –> 00:09:55,580
随便对着谁 就能显示个人信息
You just point it at anybody, tells you who they are

252
00:09:55,580 –> 00:09:57,740
还会告诉你他们在展会有多重要
and how important they are to the conference.

253
00:10:00,700 –> 00:10:02,390
都没有你的信息
You’re not showing up at all.

254
00:10:02,590 –> 00:10:06,100
也许我没有…不对我有信号
Yeah, maybe I’m not getting a… No, I’m getting a signal.

255
00:10:07,430 –> 00:10:09,720
好吧
OK. Um, well…

256
00:10:11,170 –> 00:10:14,570
贾里德 可回收的扔那边
Ooh, Jared, Jared, recycling’s over there.

257
00:10:14,880 –> 00:10:17,240
怎么回事了 那个评委知道吗
Hey, so what’s the deal? Does the judge know or not?

258
00:10:17,240 –> 00:10:19,260
我不知道 莫妮卡 他耍我呢
I don’t know, Monica. He’s toying with me.

259
00:10:20,350 –> 00:10:23,210
也许不是 我也搞不清
Or maybe he’s not. I can’t fucking figure it out.

260
00:10:23,210 –> 00:10:26,190
埃利希 你不能这样 他妻子也来了
Erlich, you need to stop this. His wife is here.

261
00:10:26,200 –> 00:10:28,530
有种点 去找她谈谈 搞清楚
Grow a pair and talk to her, find out for sure.

262
00:10:28,530 –> 00:10:31,530
你怎么不有种点 我去找她谈
Why don’t you grow a pair and I’ll talk to her.

263
00:10:33,190 –> 00:10:34,220
什么
What?

264
00:10:41,450 –> 00:10:42,870
你会Java吗
Do you happen to know Java?

265
00:10:43,550 –> 00:10:45,910
你搞笑吗 我最擅长Java
Are you kidding? It’s like my specialty.

266
00:10:45,910 –> 00:10:47,140
能帮帮我吗
Will you help me?

267
00:10:48,880 –> 00:10:51,600
荣幸不已
Oh, it would be my honor.

268
00:11:10,770 –> 00:11:11,490
怎么了
Yes?

269
00:11:11,490 –> 00:11:14,640
抱歉 我一定走错房间了
Oh, sorry. Um, I must not have the right room.

270
00:11:14,640 –> 00:11:16,630
我要找丹·梅尔彻
I’m looking for Dan Melcher.

271
00:11:16,630 –> 00:11:17,670
没错 就是这间
Yeah, that’s us.

272
00:11:17,670 –> 00:11:19,050
是吗 好吧
Oh, it is? OK.

273
00:11:19,050 –> 00:11:21,250
我想和他妻子谈谈
I was looking to speak with his wife.

274
00:11:21,600 –> 00:11:25,830
就是我 我是他新任妻子 刚结婚
That’s me. I’m, well, his new wife, we just got married.

275
00:11:25,830 –> 00:11:27,630
祝贺啊
Oh, congratulations.

276
00:11:28,020 –> 00:11:31,210
玛德琳怎么了
Uh, what happened with Madelyn?

277
00:11:31,540 –> 00:11:33,700
-你是丹的朋友吗 -是

  • You’re a friend of Dan’s? - Yeah.

278
00:11:33,700 –> 00:11:36,230
我俩 有个交集 有过
We’ve… We have a common interest…s.

279
00:11:36,230 –> 00:11:38,530
有好多交集
Uh, many common interests.

280
00:11:38,530 –> 00:11:40,330
她真是糟透了
Well, she was a nightmare.

281
00:11:40,670 –> 00:11:43,240
嗑药 进了无数趟戒毒所
Pills, in and out of rehab.

282
00:11:43,240 –> 00:11:45,780
还搞出些令人作呕的绯闻
Had all of these disgusting affairs.

283
00:11:45,990 –> 00:11:47,880
离婚后丹差点一蹶不振
You know, the divorce nearly killed Dan.

284
00:11:47,880 –> 00:11:50,790
真的吗 令人作呕吗
Really? Disgusting affairs.

285
00:11:51,840 –> 00:11:53,670
这消息真令人难过
Well, I… I feel terrible.

286
00:11:53,680 –> 00:11:56,800
没事的 他看开了
No, it’s fine. He’s put it behind him.

287
00:11:56,900 –> 00:11:59,940
都看开了吗 所有方面
All of it? I mean, every aspect of it?

288
00:12:01,020 –> 00:12:03,910
那…真是个好消息
Well, that is… That is great to hear.

289
00:12:04,750 –> 00:12:07,250
万一她把这胡话告诉大会上每一个人怎么办
What if she’s spreading this lie to everyone at this conference?

290
00:12:07,250 –> 00:12:08,490
老实说 吉尔弗约尔
I mean, honestly, Gilfoyle…

291
00:12:08,490 –> 00:12:10,230
理查德 你要是再扯这事
Richard, stop talking about this

292
00:12:10,230 –> 00:12:12,820
我就糊你熊脸
or I have to punch you in the face.

293
00:12:12,820 –> 00:12:17,250
我操 这么大
Fuck. It is huge.

294
00:12:18,610 –> 00:12:20,460
不见尽头啊
Very, very huge.

295
00:12:20,460 –> 00:12:22,560
测试 一二一
Check, one-two two,

296
00:12:22,560 –> 00:12:24,810
瓜子花生王大娘
tsetse fly, tsetse fly.

297
00:12:24,820 –> 00:12:26,440
演示做得怎么样了
Hey, how’s the demo coming?

298
00:12:26,440 –> 00:12:30,690
这个 差不多了 没错 差不多了
Um, we’re getting there. Uh, definitely… getting there.

299
00:12:30,920 –> 00:12:32,920
先生们 好消息来了
Gentlemen, I bring good tidings.

300
00:12:32,920 –> 00:12:37,370
原来梅尔彻离婚了 又找了个新的
Turns out that Melcher is divorced, remarried

301
00:12:37,370 –> 00:12:40,860
他和前妻的感情纠葛都过去了
and has put the previously relationship behind him completely.

302
00:12:40,900 –> 00:12:42,130
问题解决了
Problem solved.

303
00:12:42,130 –> 00:12:43,660
真是太好了
That’s great.

304
00:12:43,660 –> 00:12:46,760
当然好 理查德 当然好
It sure is, Richard, it sure as hell is.

305
00:12:48,200 –> 00:12:50,090
看看这些蠢货
Look at these poor fuckers.

306
00:12:50,300 –> 00:12:52,420
要被碾压了都不知道
They don’t even know what’s about to hit ‘em.

307
00:12:52,920 –> 00:12:54,560
看哥天神下凡
The hammer of God.

308
00:12:54,770 –> 00:12:56,620
太抱歉了 太抱歉了
I am so sorry! I am so sorry.

309
00:12:56,620 –> 00:12:58,080
我还以为你们会来叫我的
I thought you guys were gonna come get me

310
00:12:58,080 –> 00:12:59,930
所以我 太抱歉了
and… and I’m sorry.

311
00:12:59,930 –> 00:13:01,740
等下 贾里德 你来做什么
Wait, Jared, what are you doing here?

312
00:13:01,740 –> 00:13:02,300
什么
What?

313
00:13:02,300 –> 00:13:03,780
-谁在看展台呢 -是啊

  • Who’s watching the booth? - Yeah.

314
00:13:03,780 –> 00:13:05,740
我还以为莫妮卡会
I thought that maybe Monica could…

315
00:13:05,750 –> 00:13:08,970
-她又不是职员 -再说我们需要她帮忙

  • She’s not in the company. - We need her here. That’s the thing.

316
00:13:08,970 –> 00:13:09,740
好了 各位
All right, everybody,

317
00:13:09,740 –> 00:13:11,560
我要给主要领导人员讲一下流程
this run-through is for essential personnel only,

318
00:13:11,560 –> 00:13:13,070
闲杂人等退下
essential only.

319
00:13:16,580 –> 00:13:19,230
-我们真的需要有人看着展台 -好的

  • We need someone in the booth is the thing. - Right.

320
00:13:19,230 –> 00:13:20,730
你在展台不算闲杂人员
You’re essential to the booth.

321
00:13:20,730 –> 00:13:21,760
好…
Right.

322
00:13:22,590 –> 00:13:23,640
好 每一支队伍
All right, each team will

323
00:13:23,640 –> 00:13:26,220
都有六分钟进行概要介绍和功能演示
have six minutes for presentation and demo,

324
00:13:26,220 –> 00:13:27,840
然后裁判会问几个问题
at which point the judges will ask a few questions…

325
00:13:27,840 –> 00:13:29,890
容我打断你一下 就问你一个小问题
Uh, do you mind if I break in here, just one question.

326
00:13:29,890 –> 00:13:32,620
裁判们在听完我们的展示之后
Uh, are the judges allowed to send us through

327
00:13:32,620 –> 00:13:34,830
是直接判我们进入决赛
to the finals immediately after we present

328
00:13:34,830 –> 00:13:39,450
还是等全部演示完再做决定
or do we have to wait until everyone else has gone?

329
00:13:40,530 –> 00:13:43,000
怎么了 大家不都想知道吗
What? I’m just saying what everybody’s thinking.

330
00:13:47,120 –> 00:13:48,620
您好 您叫什么名字
Hello, what’s your name?

331
00:13:48,920 –> 00:13:51,170
请浏览microdrone.com
Visit us at microdrone.Com.

332
00:13:51,170 –> 00:13:53,860
-谢了不要 -下载这段创业展会上

  • Uh, excuse me, no thank you. - and download a free video of you

333
00:13:53,860 –> 00:13:56,080
-您是主角的视频 -不用了

  • at TechCrunch Disrupt - Uh, no thank you.

334
00:13:56,090 –> 00:14:00,670
内森 你是’指译’执行官内森·齐默曼吗
Nathan. Are you Nathan Zimmerman, CEO of Flingual?

335
00:14:00,670 –> 00:14:03,040
我 这个 不管是谁弄的 我不用
I… I… Whoever’s doing this, no thank you.

336
00:14:03,050 –> 00:14:05,760
我感觉这里有个盲区 就这里音效特差
Yeah, I think we got a dead zone, an audio dead zone right here.

337
00:14:05,760 –> 00:14:06,980
你听这个
Listen to this.

338
00:14:08,050 –> 00:14:09,740
听见了吗 再听这个
Hear that? Compared to…

339
00:14:10,120 –> 00:14:11,140
好 我要的效果是这样的
OK, here’s what I want.

340
00:14:11,140 –> 00:14:12,880
-音乐一起来 -还有音乐

  • As soon as the music comes up… - Music?

341
00:14:12,880 –> 00:14:15,960
我要你一下子把光聚到我这里 其余全暗
I want you to hit me with a spotlight, bam! And a hard spot.

342
00:14:15,960 –> 00:14:18,010
对了 你们有没有那种
Better yet, do you have those spotlights that…

343
00:14:18,010 –> 00:14:19,940
从地上升起的大灯
hoooom, come up from the ground,

344
00:14:20,050 –> 00:14:22,180
-格斗大赛那种 -这个 我查查看

  • like in Pride Fighting? - Uh… I can check.

345
00:14:22,180 –> 00:14:25,460
好 那种灯一边一个 中间再来一个
OK, so two of those, one on each side and then one in the center

346
00:14:25,460 –> 00:14:27,670
把我的影子投在整面幕墙上
so that it casts my shadow behind me,

347
00:14:27,670 –> 00:14:30,150
像个巨人深沉地凝视他们
like a giant looking over his own shoulder.

348
00:14:30,310 –> 00:14:31,620
你们有鼓风机吗
Do you have any wind machines.

349
00:14:31,620 –> 00:14:33,360
我要两台
I’m gonna need two of those…

350
00:14:33,360 –> 00:14:35,040
你不是在哼小曲吧
Are you humming to yourself?

351
00:14:35,140 –> 00:14:36,690
我 我有吗
Was… was I?

352
00:14:37,860 –> 00:14:40,460
实话跟你们说吧
Uh, you know, honestly,

353
00:14:40,630 –> 00:14:42,960
我貌似找到真命天女了
I may have found the perfect woman.

354
00:14:43,120 –> 00:14:45,260
是吗 谁啊谁啊谁啊
Whoa. What? Who? Who?

355
00:14:45,270 –> 00:14:47,090
她就在咱们旁边的展台 夏洛特
She’s in the booth right next to us, Charlotte.

356
00:14:47,090 –> 00:14:49,480
她外型上完全不是我的菜 你看那一头黄毛
She’s not even physically my type, she has blonde hair

357
00:14:49,480 –> 00:14:50,220
蠢乎乎的粉条绒衫
and these stupid pink

358
00:14:50,220 –> 00:14:52,670
而且一点女王范儿都没有
streaks and doesn’t seem to be dominant at all.

359
00:14:53,200 –> 00:14:55,850
但是 我似乎爱上她了
However, I think I’m in love.

360
00:14:55,860 –> 00:14:57,320
强啊
Whoa.

361
00:14:57,900 –> 00:15:01,210
她邀请我今晚去她房间看《云图》
She invited me to her room to watch Cloud Atlas later tonight.

362
00:15:01,210 –> 00:15:03,160
正点 她这是想要你上她
Oh yeah, that means she wants you to lay her.

363
00:15:03,920 –> 00:15:04,980
真的吗
Is that definitive?

364
00:15:04,980 –> 00:15:07,390
那电影是个人就看不下去
I mean, nobody can watch more than like a minute of that film.

365
00:15:07,390 –> 00:15:09,440
所以她怎么样 辣吗
So what’s the deal? I mean, is she hot?

366
00:15:09,440 –> 00:15:11,040
她的确很有魅力
Yeah, I mean, she’s attractive,

367
00:15:11,040 –> 00:15:13,080
但我眼里是个女人就有魅力
but almost every woman is attractive.

368
00:15:13,080 –> 00:15:14,780
我爱的是她的头脑
It was her mind.

369
00:15:14,780 –> 00:15:16,640
她写的Java
She wrote this Java method that was

370
00:15:16,640 –> 00:15:19,710
是我这辈子见识过的最美妙的东西了
the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen in my life.

371
00:15:19,730 –> 00:15:21,690
精妙 简洁
Elegant, tight.

372
00:15:22,130 –> 00:15:22,830
手上功夫如此绝伦
There’s just something

373
00:15:22,830 –> 00:15:25,190
这样的女人是多么撩人啊
so hot about a woman that can code like that.

374
00:15:25,190 –> 00:15:26,220
你懂的 我真想马上就
You know, I just want to…

375
00:15:26,220 –> 00:15:28,860
爬进她的大脑前页
crawl in her frontal lobe and…

376
00:15:30,240 –> 00:15:31,140
你笑什么
What’s up?

377
00:15:31,930 –> 00:15:33,880
你知道那段程序是我写的吧
You know I wrote that code, right?

378
00:15:34,060 –> 00:15:36,590
不 程序在她的系统里
No, this code was on her system.

379
00:15:36,590 –> 00:15:40,480
多处磕碰还有逗逼贴纸的十五寸苹果本
A banged up 15-inch MacBook Pro with shitty stickers on it?

380
00:15:40,480 –> 00:15:42,700
这里所有人的十五寸苹果本都遍体鳞伤
Everyone here has a beat up 15-inch MacBook Pro…

381
00:15:42,700 –> 00:15:45,700
1.3的芯片 内存只有两G
With a 1.3 chip and only two gigs of RAM?

382
00:15:45,710 –> 00:15:48,950
她不懂Java 程序是我写的
She doesn’t know Java. I wrote that code.

383
00:15:50,060 –> 00:15:52,750
-你说你爱上了她的思想 -干

  • You said you were in love with her mind. - Oh fuck.

384
00:15:52,750 –> 00:15:55,040
你知道这意味着什么吧
You realize what’s going on, right?

385
00:15:55,230 –> 00:15:58,560
你感”性”趣的不是她 是我的程序
It’s not her you’re sexually attracted to, it’s my code.

386
00:15:58,560 –> 00:16:00,040
给我他妈的闭 这真是
Shut the… That is the

387
00:16:00,050 –> 00:16:01,660
我经历的最他妈恶心的事儿了
most disgusting fucking thing I’ve ever h…

388
00:16:01,660 –> 00:16:05,220
面对现实吧 迪尼希 你是个程序基
Just face it, Dinesh, you’re gay for my code, you’re code gay.

389
00:16:05,230 –> 00:16:09,220
不 我感兴趣的是她 我操你的程序
No! No, I’m into her. Her, OK? Fuck your code!

390
00:16:09,220 –> 00:16:10,940
你确实想操我的程序吧
You’d like to fuck my code, wouldn’t you?

391
00:16:10,940 –> 00:16:13,730
你想对我刚写的子程序打飞机吗
Hey, would you like to masturbate to the subroutine I just wrote?

392
00:16:13,750 –> 00:16:16,180
不 这个 我
No! It’s… I’m… I’m…

393
00:16:16,180 –> 00:16:18,570
然后我就在中间这里
And then I’ll sort of close right here in the center

394
00:16:18,570 –> 00:16:20,730
以他们从未见过的姿态
with a confidence and poise that, well,

395
00:16:20,730 –> 00:16:23,320
优雅地结束展示
they probably won’t have seen up until this point.

396
00:16:24,030 –> 00:16:25,280
就是这时候
And then at that point we’ve got

397
00:16:25,280 –> 00:16:27,770
大屏幕上需要显示一些照片
some photos that we’re gonna throw up on the big screen.

398
00:16:27,820 –> 00:16:28,570
照片
Photos?

399
00:16:28,580 –> 00:16:30,410
对 几张而已
Yeah, you know, just a few.

400
00:16:30,420 –> 00:16:33,260
甘地 马丁·路德·金 年少好奇的我
Gandhi, MLK, me as an inquisitive child.

401
00:16:33,610 –> 00:16:34,720
理查德 能帮个忙吗
Richard, could you please.

402
00:16:34,720 –> 00:16:36,910
当然 稍等 我只需要把这个插好
Oh, yes, sorry. I’ll just plug it in here.

403
00:16:39,730 –> 00:16:40,760
不 不要
No! Don’t!

404
00:16:41,320 –> 00:16:42,430
-不要 -我擦

  • Don’t! - Oh, shi…

405
00:16:42,430 –> 00:16:43,850
-我操 -我擦

  • What the fuck!? - Shit.

406
00:16:44,810 –> 00:16:46,390
她就在这里
Oh, she’s here.

407
00:16:48,650 –> 00:16:50,760
我擦 卡住了 卡住了
Oh, shit, it’s frozen. It’s frozen.

408
00:16:50,820 –> 00:16:52,710
很明显那不是我
That is not me, obviously.

409
00:16:52,950 –> 00:16:54,660
是他不肯放手 不好意思
He’s obsessed with me. I’m sorry.

410
00:16:56,480 –> 00:16:58,910
{\an8}客房内电影点播
感谢您购买电影《云图》

411
00:17:06,720 –> 00:17:08,480
你怎么了
Hey, what’s wrong?

412
00:17:11,090 –> 00:17:13,930
我有点紧张 因为你太漂亮了
I’m just a little nervous ‘cause you’re so beautiful.

413
00:17:15,570 –> 00:17:16,450
是吗
Oh?

414
00:17:16,790 –> 00:17:17,840
随便问一句
Random question…

415
00:17:18,740 –> 00:17:21,300
那段Java程序不是你写的吗
So you didn’t write any of that Java code?

416
00:17:22,870 –> 00:17:24,080
不过每条微博都是我写的
But I write all of our tweets

417
00:17:24,080 –> 00:17:25,770
已经有好几百粉丝了
and we have like a couple hundred followers.

418
00:17:26,500 –> 00:17:27,440
好几百
Couple hundred…

419
00:17:30,570 –> 00:17:32,850
我把这个拿开
Oh, let me move this.

420
00:17:40,830 –> 00:17:42,650
那就是你朋友写的程序
Oh, that’s the code your friend wrote.

421
00:17:42,650 –> 00:17:44,490
-没错 -写得很不错吧

  • Yeah, it is. - It’s really good, huh?

422
00:17:44,700 –> 00:17:47,620
还行 不过我没兴趣
It’s fine. I don’t care about it.

423
00:17:51,150 –> 00:17:52,670
你有反应了哦
Mm, there we go.

424
00:17:56,150 –> 00:17:57,130
我操
Oh, fu…

425
00:17:59,080 –> 00:18:01,240
冷静 冷静
Come on, focus, focus.

426
00:18:20,870 –> 00:18:22,390
理查德一定弄不完吧
Richard’s not gonna finish, is he?

427
00:18:22,390 –> 00:18:24,520
他可以的 吉尔弗约尔 他必须弄完
He’ll finish, Gilfoyle, he has to.

428
00:18:27,300 –> 00:18:28,200
你还好吗
Are you OK?

429
00:18:29,130 –> 00:18:30,430
我很好
Yeah, I’m fine.

430
00:18:30,640 –> 00:18:33,340
我就知道 你肯定做不到
I knew it. You couldn’t do it.

431
00:18:34,730 –> 00:18:38,190
你给我闭嘴 闭嘴
Please shut up. Shut up.

432
00:18:38,270 –> 00:18:41,610
为什么每次我要跟女人上床
Why is it that every time I’m about to have sex with a lady…

433
00:18:43,460 –> 00:18:45,090
他都会占据我的脑海
he’s all up in there somehow?

434
00:18:45,090 –> 00:18:48,560
终于只剩我们了 这一轮算我的
Finally, just us. Guys, this round is on me.

435
00:18:48,650 –> 00:18:50,770
贾里德 你们在这啊
Hey, Jared. There you guys go.

436
00:18:51,880 –> 00:18:54,390
-为’魔笛手’干杯 -为’魔笛手’干杯

  • To Pied Piper. Hmm? - To Pied Piper.

437
00:18:55,050 –> 00:18:56,230
干杯 干杯
Here, here.

438
00:18:56,930 –> 00:18:58,290
干了吧
Yeah, drink it up.

439
00:18:59,810 –> 00:19:01,680
不过这也改变不了你的身份
But it’s not gonna change who you are.

440
00:19:02,310 –> 00:19:05,040
莫妮卡 我能跟你谈一下吗
Monica, can I speak to you for a minute?

441
00:19:05,220 –> 00:19:06,270
当然
Yeah.

442
00:19:07,010 –> 00:19:08,680
不 雪莉 就是现在
No, Sherry, it has to be now!

443
00:19:08,680 –> 00:19:09,580
我擦
Oh, shit.

444
00:19:09,720 –> 00:19:11,670
听着 我们必须说清楚
OK, look, we need to talk.

445
00:19:11,670 –> 00:19:14,300
你跟别人说我不肯放手 不是这样的
You keep telling people I’m obsessed with you. It’s not true…

446
00:19:14,300 –> 00:19:15,900
理查德 你能退后一点吗
Richard, why don’t you just take a step back…

447
00:19:16,280 –> 00:19:17,390
不 不 让我说完
No, no, no, let me finish.

448
00:19:17,390 –> 00:19:19,930
是我把你的照片
OK, did I put your picture

449
00:19:19,930 –> 00:19:21,630
放上礼堂的大屏幕了吗 没错
up on the big screen in the auditorium? Yes.

450
00:19:21,630 –> 00:19:23,990
可那是因为我要给我朋友看你的照片
But that’s because I was showing you to my friends

451
00:19:23,990 –> 00:19:26,420
证明不是我不肯放手
to prove a point that I’m not obsessed with you.

452
00:19:26,420 –> 00:19:27,880
理查德 我必须走了
Richard, I’m gonna go now.

453
00:19:27,880 –> 00:19:30,120
我没有不肯放手 雪莉
No, I’m not obsessed with you, Sherry!

454
00:19:31,070 –> 00:19:31,880

I’m…

455
00:19:33,950 –> 00:19:34,880
我没有
I’m not.

456
00:19:36,000 –> 00:19:37,710
我跟你说过那个理查德
That guy Richard I was telling you about

457
00:19:37,710 –> 00:19:39,420
已经为我疯狂了
just totally freaked out on me

458
00:19:39,610 –> 00:19:40,990
不肯放手那个
Yeah, the obsessed guy.

459
00:19:41,040 –> 00:19:42,500
-你在哪 -自从我们到达会场

  • Where are you? - You’ve been doing this ever since

460
00:19:42,500 –> 00:19:44,020
-你就一直这样 -哪个电梯

  • we arrived at the conference. - Which elevators?

461
00:19:44,020 –> 00:19:45,190
你真的认为
You really think that you

462
00:19:45,190 –> 00:19:48,160
你能介入我和理查德·亨德里克斯之间吗
can come between me and Richard Hendricks?

463
00:19:48,160 –> 00:19:51,840
我们是搭档[伴侣] 我这两个月
We’re partners, OK, and I’ve devoted every second

464
00:19:51,840 –> 00:19:55,070
每一秒钟都献给了他
of my waking life for the past two months to him, OK?

465
00:19:55,070 –> 00:19:56,620
献给他和
I am devoted to him and to

466
00:19:56,630 –> 00:19:59,180
我们一起创建的宝贵事业
the precious thing that we’re building together!

467
00:19:59,190 –> 00:20:02,290
我是他的搭档 我能看出来
I’m his partner. I can tell when he’s vomiting…

468
00:20:02,430 –> 00:20:04,590
-什么 不是 -他呕吐是因为紧张

  • What? No. - …because he’s nervous or when he’s vomiting…

469
00:20:04,590 –> 00:20:06,150
-没事了 凯特 我很好 -还是生病

  • Never mind, Kate, I’m fine. - …because he’s sick

470
00:20:06,150 –> 00:20:08,330
还是因为吃了香菜 虽然他喜欢吃
or when he’s vomiting because he had cilantro, which he loves

471
00:20:08,330 –> 00:20:10,150
但是不能吃 因为会让他…
but he shouldn’t have because it makes him…

472
00:20:10,150 –> 00:20:13,120
我完全不知道会让你产生误解
I had no idea that you felt this way.

473
00:20:13,130 –> 00:20:15,170
我说真的 我很抱歉
I mean it, I am so sorry.

474
00:20:15,340 –> 00:20:18,000
我居然不肯放手
I mean, I’m obsessed with her…

475
00:20:18,000 –> 00:20:20,830
理查德 能和你说句话吗
Richard, can I talk to you for a second?

476
00:20:23,540 –> 00:20:24,490
好啊
Uh, OK.

477
00:20:29,120 –> 00:20:32,130
我要向你道歉 我真是大错特错
I owe you an apology. I was way off base.

478
00:20:32,510 –> 00:20:33,900
是啊 你想错了
Well, yeah, you were.

479
00:20:34,690 –> 00:20:36,170
他把一切都解释清楚了
He cleared it all up for me.

480
00:20:36,450 –> 00:20:37,430
贾里德 是吗
Jared? Really?

481
00:20:37,430 –> 00:20:38,910
是的 他是你的伴侣[搭档] 是吧
Yeah. He’s your partner, right?

482
00:20:39,530 –> 00:20:42,090
是啊 其中之一吧
Yeah, he is. One of many.

483
00:20:42,900 –> 00:20:43,850
好多个呢
Probably too many.

484
00:20:44,830 –> 00:20:46,590
我怎么能没看出来呢
How could I not have seen this?

485
00:20:47,070 –> 00:20:48,940
显然你对我没兴趣
Obviously you’re not obsessed with me.

486
00:20:49,860 –> 00:20:52,020
理查德 虽然和我无关
Richard, it’s none of my business, but

487
00:20:52,990 –> 00:20:56,640
-但要注意安全 好吗 -好的

  • be safe. OK? - OK.

488
00:20:58,720 –> 00:20:59,900
我当然很安全
Of course I’m safe. I

489
00:20:59,950 –> 00:21:01,840
我每天要把系统备份五次
backup my whole system like five times a day.

490
00:21:02,670 –> 00:21:06,210
贾里德
So… uh, Jared, hey,

491
00:21:07,330 –> 00:21:08,220
谢谢你
thank you.

492
00:21:08,640 –> 00:21:09,480
谢我什么
For what?

493
00:21:09,480 –> 00:21:11,090
感谢你做的一切
Uh, you know, everything.

494
00:21:11,090 –> 00:21:13,330
我觉得我们对你不够感激
I feel like we don’t appreciate you enough,

495
00:21:13,330 –> 00:21:15,090
谢谢你
so thank you.

496
00:21:17,790 –> 00:21:19,200
你在哭吗
Are you… are you crying?

497
00:21:19,890 –> 00:21:20,810
你在哭吗
Are you crying?

498
00:21:22,000 –> 00:21:24,810
别这样 别哭了
Uh, don’t do that. Don’t cry.

499
00:21:28,310 –> 00:21:31,060
该死 我要回去干活了
Oh, shit. I gotta get back to work.

500
00:21:31,060 –> 00:21:32,770
我得集中精力
I… I need to focus here.

501
00:21:32,770 –> 00:21:33,980
我们都该走了
We should all go.

502
00:21:34,180 –> 00:21:35,820
好吧 我来结这轮的账
All right, I’m taking care of this one.

503
00:21:35,830 –> 00:21:37,300
我们赢了这破比赛之后
But when we win this fuckin’ thing,

504
00:21:37,300 –> 00:21:39,200
理查德 你来请下一轮
Richard, you’re buying the next round.

505
00:21:39,230 –> 00:21:40,050
好的
Yeah.

506
00:21:41,950 –> 00:21:44,490
不是吧
Oh… no.

507
00:21:45,010 –> 00:21:47,820
我们是参展人员 有折扣吗
We’re with the conference, is there any sort of discount…?

508
00:21:48,510 –> 00:21:50,660
有什么优惠吗
Kind of break you can…?

509
00:21:50,660 –> 00:21:51,780
没有吗 好吧
No. All right.

510
00:21:52,720 –> 00:21:55,090
-你好啊 又见面了 -嗨

  • Hello again. - Oh, hi.

511
00:21:55,990 –> 00:21:56,730
你这么关心丹
You know, that was really

512
00:21:56,740 –> 00:21:59,040
真是太贴心了
sweet of you to be so concerned about Dan.

513
00:21:59,490 –> 00:22:00,920
他经历了一段很艰难的时期
He really has been through hell.

514
00:22:01,200 –> 00:22:03,150
绵薄之力吧
Well, it’s the least I could do.

515
00:22:04,170 –> 00:22:06,410
你是怎么认识玛德琳的来着
So how did you know Madelyn again?

516
00:22:06,860 –> 00:22:09,610
说来话长了
Oh, uh, long story.

517
00:22:11,970 –> 00:22:14,720
我得承认 我很好奇
I have to admit, I’m curious.

518
00:22:17,660 –> 00:22:19,370
你先好奇着吧
You know what, keep it open.

519
00:22:23,340 –> 00:22:24,650
有没有一个人在你心中重要万分
Have you ever cared too much?

520
00:22:25,530 –> 00:22:27,180
{\an8}中央大厅展览中心
‘科技博客’创业展会
创业竞技场
5月16-18日

521
00:22:29,890 –> 00:22:32,780
大家准备好了吗
People, are you ready?

522
00:22:33,270 –> 00:22:36,820
准备好参加最终的科技创业竞争了吗
Are you ready for the ultimate tech startup competition?

523
00:22:37,370 –> 00:22:38,750
让我听到你们的声音
Let me hear it:

524
00:22:38,950 –> 00:22:41,180
创业展会
Disrupt!

525
00:22:41,800 –> 00:22:43,400
创业展会
Disrupt.

526
00:22:45,610 –> 00:22:48,440
大家好 我叫赛义德·乔布蓝尼
Hello. My name is Saeed Jobrani.

527
00:22:49,160 –> 00:22:51,120
我是’瞬间报错’的首席执行官
I am the CEO of ImmediBug.

528
00:22:51,130 –> 00:22:57,020
{\an8}可以强大的分析所有移动平台

529
00:22:51,870 –> 00:22:53,950
我们要彻底改变
And we’re here to revolutionize

530
00:22:54,270 –> 00:22:57,090
大家在移动平台上报告错误的方式
the way you report bugs on your mobile platform.

531
00:22:57,090 –> 00:22:59,030
‘发现者’会彻底改变
Happin! will revolutionize

532
00:22:59,030 –> 00:23:01,430
基于位置的移动新闻汇聚的及时程度
location-based mobile news aggregation as you know it.

533
00:23:01,810 –> 00:23:05,190
达成一致性协议的分布式选举算法
We’re making the world a better place, through Paxos Algorithms

534
00:23:03,600 –> 00:23:06,880
{\an8}用于达成一致性协议的分布式选举算法
社会的
移动的
当前的

535
00:23:05,420 –> 00:23:06,650
让世界更美好
for consensus protocols.

536
00:23:07,000 –> 00:23:08,830
我们要通过软件定义云计算的数据中心
And we’re making the world a better place

537
00:23:08,750 –> 00:23:11,600
{\an8}’比特梵色’ 值得投资的理念

538
00:23:08,840 –> 00:23:11,680
让世界更加美好
through software defined data centers for cloud computing.

539
00:23:11,890 –> 00:23:13,590
通过标准数据模型
…A better place through canonical

540
00:23:13,030 –> 00:23:16,130
{\an8}’瑜伽大师’
企业应用集成
标准数据模型
基于信息的集成方法

541
00:23:13,590 –> 00:23:16,010
进行端点间沟通 让世界更加美好
data models to communicate between endpoints.

542
00:23:16,270 –> 00:23:18,170
通过资产交易中可扩展可容错的
A better place through scalable,

543
00:23:17,070 –> 00:23:21,480
{\an8}’指译’专有数据技术
可扩展
可容错
分布式
数据库事务属性

544
00:23:18,170 –> 00:23:21,490
分布式数据库 让世界更加美好
fault-tolerant distributed databases with asset transactions.

545
00:23:18,170 –> 00:23:21,490
资产交易中可容错的分布式数据库
fault-tolerant distributed databases with asset transactions.

546
00:23:21,490 –> 00:23:24,290
我们是真正的本地化 移动化 社交化
And we are truly local mobile social.

547
00:23:24,290 –> 00:23:27,080
我们完全是社交化 移动化 本地化
And we’re completely So-Mo-Lo.

548
00:23:27,080 –> 00:23:28,170
我们是移动化 本地化 社交化
And we’re Mo-Lo-So.

549
00:23:28,170 –> 00:23:30,020
我们可是本地化 移动化 社交化啊
We’re Lo-Mo-So, bro.

550
00:23:30,020 –> 00:23:31,870
我们之前是社交化 本地化 移动化
We were So-Lo-Mo

551
00:23:31,870 –> 00:23:33,630
但现在我们是移动化 本地化 社交化
but now we’re Mo-Lo-So.

552
00:23:34,310 –> 00:23:36,710
不对 移动化 社交化 本地化
No, Mo-So-Lo. No…

553
00:23:40,080 –> 00:23:41,190
要不要我给你拿点水喝
You want me to get a water or something?

554
00:23:41,190 –> 00:23:42,400
-把这个喝了 -给

  • Yeah, drink this. - Here.

555
00:23:44,440 –> 00:23:46,560
-所以我们都准备好了吗 -非常好

  • So we’re all good? - We’re all great.

556
00:23:46,560 –> 00:23:49,840
搞定了 所有测试的压缩测试评分是2.89
I killed it. Our Weissman score on all tests: 2.89.

557
00:23:49,840 –> 00:23:51,530
刚刚好是理论限值
Right at the theoretical limit.

558
00:23:51,580 –> 00:23:53,790
所有模块都运转正常
Yeah, all the edge modules are humming.

559
00:23:53,790 –> 00:23:56,600
移动端也是 他们可以随便发难
Uh, even on mobile. They can throw anything at us.

560
00:23:56,680 –> 00:24:00,740
太好了 祝你们好运 我回座位了
Great. Well, good luck. I’m gonna go find my seat.

561
00:24:01,020 –> 00:24:02,790
除了3D视频
Um, except 3D video.

562
00:24:03,950 –> 00:24:04,750
什么
What?

563
00:24:04,750 –> 00:24:06,980
3D视频还有些处理不好
3D video’s still a little hinky.

564
00:24:06,990 –> 00:24:09,460
埃利希最好引导他们避开这个问题
Erlich better steer them away from that just to be safe.

565
00:24:09,880 –> 00:24:11,220
埃利希去哪里了
Where the hell is Erlich?

566
00:24:12,630 –> 00:24:13,770
他今早没和你们在一起吗
He wasn’t with you guys this morning?

567
00:24:14,390 –> 00:24:19,440
{\an8}人体加热器

568
00:24:14,440 –> 00:24:16,750
与现有加热整个房间的方式相比
Rather than heating an entire room,

569
00:24:16,770 –> 00:24:19,550
人体加热器是一种
HumanHeater is a microwave technology

570
00:24:19,550 –> 00:24:22,720
可以加热人类皮肤表面的微波技术
that can heat the surface of a person’s skin instead,

571
00:24:22,720 –> 00:24:25,640
这可以为我们节省数百万元的加热费用
potentially saving millions in heating costs

572
00:24:25,660 –> 00:24:27,370
并且更加环保
and helping the environment,

573
00:24:27,600 –> 00:24:30,120
因此这会让世界更美好
thereby making the world a better place.

574
00:24:30,930 –> 00:24:32,060
评委们
Judges.

575
00:24:33,520 –> 00:24:36,120
好吧 所以
Uh… OK, so,

576
00:24:36,860 –> 00:24:39,100
你想用微波
you want to heat people

577
00:24:39,300 –> 00:24:42,190
加热人 对吗
with microwaves, is that right?

578
00:24:42,400 –> 00:24:44,000
这肯定不安全
That can’t be safe.

579
00:24:44,000 –> 00:24:47,840
这是个好问题 相信我 它很安全
That’s a great question and trust me, it is very, very safe.

580
00:24:48,210 –> 00:24:50,350
我已经从事这项研究15年了
I’ve been working on it for 15 years.

581
00:24:50,350 –> 00:24:53,320
我不相信你 它肯定不安全
I don’t trust you and it can’t be safe.

582
00:24:53,490 –> 00:24:54,770
就算它是安全的
And even if it was, I don’t

583
00:24:54,770 –> 00:24:57,180
我觉得消费者们也不会买账
think you could ever sell the public on this.

584
00:24:57,870 –> 00:24:58,770
谢谢你
Thank you.

585
00:24:59,920 –> 00:25:02,990
我想当人们看到他们的能源开销大大减少时
I think when people see the savings on their utility bill

586
00:25:02,990 –> 00:25:03,940
还有看到这项技术
and when they see how it

587
00:25:03,950 –> 00:25:06,590
如何保护环境时 他们会买的
saves the environment, they will be sold.

588
00:25:06,590 –> 00:25:08,490
微波 你在开玩笑吗
Microwaves? Are you kidding me?

589
00:25:09,460 –> 00:25:11,720
兄弟 他们真残忍
Man, they are brutal.

590
00:25:12,030 –> 00:25:14,570
好了 让我们大放异彩吧
All right, let’s light this candle.

591
00:25:14,800 –> 00:25:16,030
你到底去哪里了
Where the hell have you been?

592
00:25:16,490 –> 00:25:18,030
有些事情有了新的进展
Uh, there’s been some developments.

593
00:25:18,030 –> 00:25:19,770
你们知道我搞了梅尔彻的前妻吧
You know how I fucked Melcher’s old wife?

594
00:25:20,080 –> 00:25:22,290
-我把他现任老婆也搞了 -什么

  • I fucked his new wife, too. - What?

595
00:25:22,290 –> 00:25:24,140
别担心 他不会发现的
Uh, don’t worry, he’s not gonna find out.

596
00:25:24,150 –> 00:25:26,410
我昨晚在他回来之前早早就走了
I left way before he got back last night and then I didn’t

597
00:25:26,420 –> 00:25:28,640
然后他今早走后20分钟我才又回去
go back this morning until 20 minutes after he had left.

598
00:25:28,640 –> 00:25:29,980
你还回去了
You went back?

599
00:25:29,980 –> 00:25:31,610
你到底搞了这个女人几回
How many times did you fuck this woman?

600
00:25:31,620 –> 00:25:33,020
你说前任还是现任
The old wife or the new wife?

601
00:25:33,180 –> 00:25:35,070
-现任 -昨晚还是今早

  • The new wife. - Last night or this morning?

602
00:25:35,390 –> 00:25:38,180
埃利希 你想什么呢 今天可是大日子
Erlich, what are you thinking? This is kind of the big day today.

603
00:25:38,180 –> 00:25:40,370
放轻松 他不会知道的 她不会告诉他
Relax, he’s not gonna find out. She’s not gonna tell him.

604
00:25:40,370 –> 00:25:41,370
你怎么知道呢
How the fuck do you know that?

605
00:25:41,370 –> 00:25:43,040
除非她疯了 不然不会说的
Because she’d have to be crazy to tell him

606
00:25:43,040 –> 00:25:45,070
而且我直接问过她是不是疯了
and I asked her point blank if she was crazy

607
00:25:45,070 –> 00:25:47,200
她跟我发誓她没疯
and she swore to me, no, she’s not crazy.

608
00:25:47,630 –> 00:25:49,870
-魔笛手 该你们了 -我们上场吧

  • Pied Piper, you’re up. - Let’s do it.

609
00:25:49,950 –> 00:25:54,000
微波只能渗入人体的最外层皮肤细胞
The microwaves only penetrate the top layer of skin cells.

610
00:25:54,000 –> 00:25:56,490
我不信 它肯定不安全
I don’t believe you. It can’t be safe.

611
00:25:56,500 –> 00:25:57,360
谢谢你
Thank you.

612
00:25:58,260 –> 00:26:02,220
我在这些人身上试验了整个冬天都没事
I’ve been testing it on these guys all winter and they’re fine.

613
00:26:02,290 –> 00:26:04,270
那就让我给你们展示一下吧
Let me just demonstrate it to assure you…

614
00:26:04,270 –> 00:26:05,370
-不不 -求你了 不要

  • No! No! - No! Please!

615
00:26:07,580 –> 00:26:11,190
没有人会买这个产品的
No one is ever going to buy one of these.

616
00:26:11,690 –> 00:26:12,550
没人
Ever.

617
00:26:12,570 –> 00:26:14,440
人体加热器到此为止
That was HumanHeater.

618
00:26:14,760 –> 00:26:17,800
接下来 有请执行主席和首席规划家
Next up, Executive Chairman and Chief Visionary

619
00:26:17,800 –> 00:26:21,340
埃利希·巴赫曼为您带来’魔笛手’
Erlich Bachman presenting Pied Piper.

620
00:26:35,590 –> 00:26:37,540
从创世之初
Since the dawn of time,

621
00:26:37,860 –> 00:26:42,190
人类就想将所有事物变得更小 但直到现在
mankind hath sought to make things smaller, but until now,

622
00:26:42,500 –> 00:26:43,550
也没有人
no man…

623
00:26:45,360 –> 00:26:46,830
你这个混蛋
You son of a bitch!

624
00:26:46,830 –> 00:26:48,850
我的天哪 大家都冷静
Jesus Christ! Everyone remain calm.

625
00:26:48,850 –> 00:26:51,310
请留在座位上 我还能控制
Stay in your seats! Everything is under control!

626
00:26:52,720 –> 00:26:53,550
灯光呢
Lights?

627
00:26:54,970 –> 00:26:55,930
我觉得他知道了
I think he knows.

632
00:27:23,490 –> 00:28:28,730
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